"Nothing Is Deserved" October 28, 2007 Reformation Sunday

(First read the text for ths sermon: Romans 3:19-28)

Many of you know I was very sick last fall and winter. Indeed, it was exactly a year ago Friday that I was taken by ambulance from my pulmonologist’s office to the Williamsburg hospital. I remember only about five hours of that hospitalization, before I was given heavy sedation and put on a ventilator. (I learned later that Pastors Behlendorf and Shoberg visited me. At the time I had no idea!) A year ago yesterday I was transferred from Williamsburg to the Intensive Care Unit at Norfolk General Hospital. It is an emotional thing for me to think that one year ago right now I was unaware of anything and anyone, breathing only because I was aided by a machine, attended by a team of very smart doctors at the Eastern Virginia Medical School who were mystified, treating me for five different possible maladies, trying to figure out what was the matter with me!

The day I will really celebrate will be this Saturday, November 3. On November 3 of last year the doctors arrived at a correct diagnosis, and began the treatment that was so effective! A week after that I was alert enough to be told by my mom that my father had died. Two weeks after that Patty finally told me what I had been through. (That’s when it began to dawn on me what she had been through).

A month after I was released from the hospital, Patty was going to drive me to Norfolk for a follow-up appointment with my infectious disease specialist, and she said, “Let’s leave an hour early and visit the nurses and therapists who took care of you in the hospital.” I agreed – although, I have to tell you, it was with fear and trepidation that I said “yes.” I wondered how I would react to being back in those Intensive Care and the Progressive Ventilator Care Units, where I had been so sick?

The visit resulted in a surrealistic experience. Patty led me to the ICU (which I wouldn’t have been able to find on my own) – and she introduced me to the veteran ICU nurse who had taken care of me that first week, and who was thrilled to see me – but of whose care I had no remembrance!

What a profoundly humbling experience – of being entirely out of control, entirely dependent upon others, literally, for my next breath.

Here’s why I’m telling you all of this: I hadn’t deserved to be sick! Was there anyone with healthier daily habits? In each of the previous three years I had averaged over 2,000 miles on my bicycle. For years I had paid close attention to my nutrition and my weight, and (for the most part) I had practiced what I preach to you about taking care of yourself: about being sure to build in times of rest and play into your daily and weekly rhythms. Didn’t I deserve good health?

I’ve never begun a Reformation Sunday sermon in this way, and forgive me if I’m being too personal. (I certainly don’t want my story to distract you from God’s Story!) But this is how I’m able to enter into the familiar verses from Romans this year, the verses that we read each year on this Lutheran festival.

You see, Paul is making the point that nothing is deserved! Our justification, our salvation, the forgiveness of our sins – none of that is deserved.

Now we know that whatever the law says, it speaks to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced, and the whole world may be held accountable to God. According to Paul, God’s law sets the standard of behavior that is pleasing to God, and we are indeed held accountable to God for what we do, for how we act towards God and how we treat other people. But not one of us can measure up to that standard, and so, not one of us deserves a reward from God for good behavior. Instead, the purpose of God’s law is to hold us to such a high, unattainable standard that here is the result: every mouth that would speak in self-righteous boasting is silenced!

For "no human being will be justified in [God’s] sight" by deeds prescribed by the law, Paul writes, for through the law comes the knowledge of sin. “The knowledge of sin” is the knowledge that you and I cannot please God – and the harder we try, the worse we feel about our sin. What bad news!

But listen to this good news! Paul writes: But now, apart from law, the righteousness of God has been disclosed, and is attested by the law and the prophets, the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. And listen to what Paul writes next: For there is no distinction, since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God; they are now justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.

It is not deserved! It is gift!

How do we receive the grace of this redemption? To use Paul’s words, it is grace effective through faith. We cannot be self-righteous, because it is God who makes us righteous!

Not one of us deserves this. There is no distinction among us. Our salvation, our justification, our forgiveness; for each one of us, it is all gift.

This theological point is the reason why there is a Lutheran church. Luther latched onto this as the core of the gospel of Jesus the Christ, and he would not let go. From this core of the gospel, Luther tried his best to reform the church of his day, so that the life of the church would reflect such grace. But the political environment was too narrow (much as it is today in the Roman Catholic Church) to allow Luther’s reforming dissent.

But consider: What grace and freedom there is when we live in the full knowledge that nothing is deserved, that our salvation, our justification, our forgiveness is all gift! We are not motivated by fear of a God who would fry us. The life of faith is not cursed by a grim religious determination to “be good” in the life-long fearful hope that God might reward us with heaven.

Instead, knowing that we are accountable, there is the return to the waters of baptism each week, speaking words of confession and hearing words of God’s forgiveness. There is the return to the holy table each week, eating and drinking God’s forgiveness of our sins, eating and drinking God’s gifts of salvation and eternal life. What a joyful climax to our weekly liturgy!

Then there is that eternal life lived out, in our daily lives! In response to receiving the undeserved gift of salvation and justification and forgiveness, we are filled with joy. We are moved to spend our days joyously doing good works for those in need!

Our salvation, our justification, our forgiveness, this day of life, our next breath – you and I deserve none of that! All of it is gift from God.
Our lives of servanthood are lived in response.

What joy!

In the name of God, who is Father and Son and Holy Spirit. Amen.

Pastor Andy Ballentine
St. Stephen Lutheran Church
Williamsburg, Virginia

"The Struggle, The Blessing" October 21, 2007 Proper 24, Pentecost 21

(First, read the passage for this sermon: Genesis 32:22-31)

Years ago, Jacob had been a real weasel. Now his past has come back to haunt him.

Do you remember the story of Jacob, from the book of Genesis? His grandparents were Abraham and Sarah, and you may remember that they were unable to conceive a child until God gave that blessing – when Abraham was 99 years old and Sarah was 89! Do you remember that Sarah thought the whole idea of a baby at that age was so funny that she laughed so hard, she fell on her face? How appropriate, then, that when the baby boy was born they named him “Isaac,” which means laughter! (See Gen 18:1-15; 21:1-7)

Isaac grew up, and he married Rebekah, and in the course of time, Rebekah gave birth to twin boys: Esau (who was born first) and Jacob. According to the custom of the people, which son was in line for inheritance? It was the first born, Esau. (Even a twin who was second born would not inherit anything.)

You may remember this great story. Esau was his father’s favorite. Esau was an outdoorsman, and great hunter; a real he-man. And he was a good boy! He played by the rules!

Jacob did not. And neither did Jacob’s mother, Rebekah. Jacob, you may remember, was Rebekah’s favorite. In fact, he was a real momma’s boy! And so, when Isaac was close to dying, too blind to see well anymore, unable to distinguish between his two sons, you may remember how Rebekah connived with Jacob to deceive Isaac into blessing Jacob instead of Esau?!

Oh the wailing and gnashing of teeth! (Esau’s teeth!) And with good reason! Jacob had stolen their father’s blessing that had been intended for Esau! He-man Esau declared that the next time he saw momma’s boy Jacob, he’d tear him limb from limb. What did Jacob do in response? Did he own up to what he had done? Did he act with integrity, at long last? (See Gen 27) What he did was: he ran away! (Do you remember all of this? What a great story! Indeed, we could spend every Sunday morning on the stories in Genesis and never get tired of them!)

This morning, as the story picks up in Genesis, it is years later. Esau and Jacob have not seen each other over those years, but both have become rich men of great status. Both have more than one wife. (There really isn’t much of what politicians now call “family values” in the Old Testament!) Both Esau and Jacob have many children and servants and cattle and sheep.

Now, with such comfort and status established, the time has come for Jacob to restore his relationship with his brother, Esau. Here’s what we read in Genesis, as chapter 32 begins: Jacob sent messengers before him to his brother Esau in the land of Seir, the country of Edom, instructing them, "Thus you shall say to my lord Esau: Thus says your servant Jacob,… I have oxen, donkeys, flocks, male and female slaves; and I have sent to tell my lord, in order that I may find favor in your sight.'"

But here’s what we read next. The messengers returned to Jacob, saying, "We came to your brother Esau, and he is coming to meet you, and four hundred men are with him."

Now. Under the circumstances, how confident would you have felt of that upcoming meeting? Jacob feels the same way! In fact, he goes into a survival mentality. Here’s what we read: Then Jacob was greatly afraid and distressed; and he divided the people that were with him, and the flocks and herds and camels, into two companies, thinking, "If Esau comes to the one company and destroys it, then the company that is left will escape."

And so, we come to this morning’s part of the story. The same night he got up and took his two wives, his two maids, and his eleven children, and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. He took them and sent them across the stream, and likewise everything that he had. Jacob was left alone;…

And we pause here. Jacob was left alone. He has sent ahead everyone and everything he owns. He is now stripped down to himself. He is alone.

When have you felt that alone?

Perhaps it was when you heard the diagnosis of cancer. Or maybe it was when the corporate structure was “right sized” and the job disappeared. Or maybe it was when you first realized your addiction. It could have been when your spouse died. When you have always assumed that you’re acting from a position of strength because you’re a healthy person; and you have a loving spouse; and you have lots of money, and the right house in the right neighborhood, and the car that turns people’s heads – when that is stripped away, what’s left?

Jacob is left alone. And then it gets worse. He is attacked! The rest of this morning’s verses describe the grappling between Jacob and a man [who wrestles] with him until daybreak. What a struggle it is!

Who is this man? The narrative doesn’t clarify – although Jacob is sure that it is God! (See verse 30) If it is God, then it is a terrifying face of God, hidden and not to be found out. (Walter Brueggeman)

In the struggle, the man strikes Jacob on the hip socket and puts his hip out of joint! This is a violent battle! Jacob is wounded!

But, in the mêlée, Jacob holds his own – and he holds on! The two grappling adversaries won’t let each other go until the struggle is over. And at the end, Jacob receives a blessing that only comes through the struggle!
Jacob is wounded in this experience. He is changed. His name, his sense of identity is changed! Through the wounding, through the struggle, Jacob is blessed.

When has this been your experience?

Usually, we try to cover up our wounds. Usually we try to even cover up signs of struggle. Almost always we try to present to the world a jaunty face: “I’m fine!” we say.

But, in different seasons of life, we find ourselves struggling! It’s not of our choosing. It’s what happens – just as Jacob finds himself attacked by his mysterious adversary! We are painfully reminded that we are mortal beings, that we can be engulfed by physical or emotional illness, by professional setbacks, by grief. It turns out that we are not Superman or Superwoman.

Here’s the thing. When we enter into the struggle, when we don’t try to cover it up or deny it, when we hold our own and just hold on, we find out that we’re more than enduring. We discover what gift there is in all of this.

Gift! This sounds like crazy talk, perhaps.

But in the struggle, we are changed. When our ego is chopped down to size in the struggle, our identity is changed. That’s a good thing, if we become healthy in humility. When disappointments and failures lead us to realize how dependent we are on God, that is a blessing. We are blessed – with a deeper understanding of what’s truly important in life, and that each day of life is a precious gift from God, and that God is profoundly present each day, even in the struggle, even when the best we can do is just to hold on to God in the grappling.

Each Sunday morning as we gather in this place, there are at least a few of us in the midst of such struggle. God calls us together to hold on to each other – and to accompany each other to this table, where, in bread and wine, the body and blood of our risen Lord, Jesus Christ, the end of all struggle is real and present for us, today! Here, around this table, there is resurrection and salvation, and peace!

In the name of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Amen.

Pastor Andy Ballentine
St. Stephen Lutheran Church
Williamsburg, Virginia

"Wait, Watch, Work, Pray" October 7, 2007 Proper 22 Pentecost 19

(First, read the text for this sermon: Habakkuk 1:1-4, 2:1-4)

It’s one of the hardest questions of all. If God is good, why do so many people suffer oppression and injustice?

That’s what the prophet Habakkuk is asking, in this morning’s verses.

O Lord, how long shall I cry for help,
and you will not listen?
Or cry to you "Violence!"
and you will not save?
Why do you make me see wrongdoing
and look at trouble?
Destruction and violence are before me;
strife and contention arise.
So the law becomes slack
and justice never prevails.
The wicked surround the righteous--
therefore judgment comes forth perverted.

Habakkuk is speaking out for the people who are suffering in the kingdom of Judah under the corruption of their King, Jehoiakim, at the beginning of the 6th century BCE. Jehoiakim is supposed to be caring for the poor and the powerless, as God desires kings to do! But, instead, this inheritor of David’s dynasty is oppressing the poor! (In fact, in only a few years, King Jehoiakim and the kingdom of Judah will be overrun and destroyed by the Babylonians. The Biblical prophets will declare that God allowed that to happen – because the kings in the Davidic line had not cared for the poor and those who are helpless.)

The problem that Habakkuk raises is one of the most difficult we face as people of faith – the challenge of believing in the ultimate power of justice in a world that is full of injustice. Even in the leadership of those who believe they are called by God, there is injustice!

Is God even noticing? That’s the startling challenge that Habakkuk hurls at God:

O Lord, how long shall I cry for help,
and you will not listen?

That is a shocking charge: that God is not listening to the cries of God’s people! The prophet is accusing God of being unfaithful!

In this crisis of faith, Habakkuk does not lose faith. He declares:

I will stand at my watchpost,
and station myself on the rampart;
I will keep watch to see what he will say to me,
and what he will answer concerning my complaint.

Now hear God’s answer, as it comes to Habakkuk:

Then the Lord answered me and said:
Write the vision;
make it plain on tablets,
so that a runner may read it.
For there is still a vision for the appointed time;
it speaks of the end, and does not lie.
If it seems to tarry, wait for it; it will surely come,
it will not delay.
Look at the proud!
Their spirit is not right in them,
but the righteous live by their faith.

What is God’s answer, as it comes to Habakkuk? Wait. Watch. God does have a purpose for history. Wait. Watch.

Can that be all?

If our church building’s stained glass windows were being installed today, I’m sure Mother Teresa would be one of the figures up there. I’m also sure that many of you have read reports of her journals that are being published. According to the report I read, in her journals Mother Teresa describes hearing the call to go to India as a young woman, to work in the midst of oppression and injustice, bringing comfort to those who are poor and suffering from their poverty. But then, according to her journals, Mother Teresa never heard a clear message from God again!

Have you heard a clear message from God? Sometimes God speaks through the words spoken by another person, when you’re struggling to discern the next step in your life’s journey. Sometimes it comes during prayer over a couple of verses of Scripture, during the practice of the lectio divina prayer form. But often, doesn’t God appear to be silent? Does this lead to despair?

This experience of God’s silence was described by great saints of the Church, long before Mother Teresa. For instance, the 16th century Spanish mystic, John of the Cross devotes many pages to what he calls “the dark night of the soul.” The great insight in this work is that we come to know God when our ideas about God are stripped away. God is mystery, far beyond human knowing. Any idea we have of God only offers insight on a very limited “piece” of God. And so, what about when that idea of God that we have clung to for many years is not sufficient for what we’re experiencing now? When it doesn’t “work” anymore? Does that mean that God doesn’t exist? Or that God isn’t listening? It may well mean, instead, that God is silent to lead us into a dark night of the soul, where our limiting ideas about God are stripped away. Then God can open us up, so that we will come to receive more fully who God is, in fact.

Wait. Watch. Is that all?

That wasn’t all for Mother Teresa. During those years, even as she experienced God to be silent, as she waited and watched, she worked! She lived with the poor every day and worked among them, bringing what relief she could to those who were suffering. And she prayed for an end to that suffering.

Wait. Watch. Work to end injustice and poverty. Pray for that end to come. There are many times when that is the wise and faithful course.

But it’s so uncomfortable! There is so much unresolved tension! We feel such pressure to do something! We want to force a resolution!

On the geopolitical level, that’s why we’re in Iraq. President Bush enjoyed the support of most in Congress when he advocated forcing a resolution, to go in and find those weapons of mass destruction. Perhaps it would have been better to continue what had been the previous course: Wait. Watch. Work to end injustice. Pray for that end to come.

We feel that same kind of pressure in our families – to do something when there is dysfunction, to try to “fix” the person who is acting out! (How often does that make a family dynamic worse?)

Wait. Watch. Work to respond with healthy behavior yourself in the face of diseased family dynamics. Pray for that health to come to the family.

A person who is hospitalized may feel the same need to force a resolution, to determine “the reason” for what’s going on. “Why am I sick?” I have even heard parishioners ask, “What have I done? Why is God punishing me?” Trying to force a conclusion leads to despair!

Much more helpful, in my own experience were those visits from my friend, Pete, who would simply sit with me. He would ask, “Where is God in all this?” And he would say, “It will take you months to figure that out.”

Wait. Watch. Work to be healthy, to do what the doctors are telling you to do! Pray for that health to return.

God is God. God is far greater than our ideas of who God is. God is not directed by our assumptions of how God is “supposed” to act!

Wait. Watch. Work. Pray.

In the name of God, who is Father and Son and Holy Spirit. Amen.

Pastor Andy Ballentine
St. Stephen Lutheran Church
Williamsburg, Virginia